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Austenasian Times

Online news for the people of the Empire

Austenasia to Assist Santa Claus

It was announced earlier this week by Prime Minister, Andrew Creed, that Austenasia would be assisting the entity known as Santa Claus during his visit during the late and early hours of December 24 and 25.

The man in question.

The Prime Minister released the following statement to the nation via Discord.

The Prime Minister then followed up with a second statement:

“By the Order of the Prime Minister, with the full Consent of the Crown:

Father Christmas has been charged by powers beyond our own understanding with the most important and sacred of obligations of bringing gifts to the unfortunate and undeserving. Many of these gifts which cannot be seen, touched, or felt, but are nonetheless delivered for the benefit of all he deigns to visit. He brings the goodwill of the heavens to all of humankind and as such, is considered by Austenasia to be a force for good.

However, the discharge of these obligations requires an incalculably huge amount of actions in Father Christmas’s annual visit to individual homes during the dead of night, that for any other being would amount to a crime. The Prime Minister’s office has determined to grant him immunity from these would-be “crimes,” knowing that the people Austenasia abhor the very thought of Father Christmas being branded, treated, or even perceived remotely the same category as a common criminal.

The Crown agrees, but also quickly determined that Father Christmas’s brief presence among us this year warrants stronger protections during its duration. The Crown has directed the Prime Minister to issue the following order:

All Austenasians are hereby obligated to aid and comfort Father Christmas when he is encountered. The nature of his actions is not to be considered; Father Christmas is an otherworldly being engaged in benevolent obligations and is not to be disturbed, hindered, or detained in any fashion.

Those citizens who are able are urged to place the traditional peace offering of milk and cookies to sustain him on his arduous journey around the world. Doing so will aid Father Christmas in brings goodwill to all of humankind and sustain this cycle for years to come.

Signed:

Lord Andrew Creed
The Prime Minister

Shiro Mephistopheles
The Crown Prince & Princeps Senatus

The Times looks forward to aiding Father Christmas in his travels and encourages all other to do the same, as outline by the Prime Minister above.

He should be expected to arrive between the hours of 2200 24/12/2024 and 0500 25/12/2024.

The Times would also like to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

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